Tag: k0scheithedeathless

Song of the day, not anon this time, because I think that has become quite pointless…. On my Own by Ashes Remain. And yes, you have become the one and only person listening to me screaming about songs that remind me of Thoschei/The Master, so I’m almost sorry! …Almost.

There’s gotta be another way out
I’ve been stuck in a cage with my doubt
I’ve tried forever getting out on my own
But every time I do this my way
I get caught in the lies of the enemy

I lay my troubles down
I’m ready for you now
Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now

Everyday by myself I’m breaking down
I don’t wanna fight alone anymore

Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can’t deny
In the end I’m realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

Every little thing that I’ve known
Is every thing I need to let go
You’re so much bigger than the world I have made
So I surrender my soul
I’m reaching out for your hope
I lay my weapons down
I’m ready for you now

Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now
Everyday by myself I’m breaking down
I don’t wanna fight alone anymore
Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can’t deny
In the end I’m realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

I don’t wanna be incomplete
I remember what you said to me
I don’t have to fight alone

Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now
Everyday by myself I’m breaking down
I don’t wanna fight alone anymore

Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can’t deny
In the end I’m realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

This is VERY much Koschei to Theta, yes? At least it completely fulfills my headcanons about Simm!Master in Series Four and especially Series Ten. 

k0scheithedeathless:

Hey,

so. I am going to keep this account open, so I can communicate with the few people I found here, maybe post once I found something worth sharing and that’s basically all there’s going to be. I’m done with trying to be active and have a nice blog, since I literally deleted something I have worked on for years and every single follower with it.
Trying to achieve the same thing just gives me pressure and anxiety, I was literally just having fun on Tumblr and it’s… not going to happen again, I suppose.

The reason I had that breakdown and deleted my account was because I realized I had literally no point on this website and that’s still… a thing. Others can photoshop beautiful pictures and GIFs, can make awesome videos, can draw the most wonderful art, can make the funniest shitposts, can do so many great things. I can write, I think I’m even pretty good at it, though that’s awfully subjective and a view that changes with my moods. But… Tumblr’s not really a platform for that. At least not for me, I can’t make it, I can’t put it out there, I don’t know how and no one really cares anyway. Every failure, every ignored post, every try I start just gives me more anxiety because I feel like a loser that people laugh at or pity or something, so I’m done. + it super much hurts to know that no one ever reads your stuff, so I think about stopping to upload all together every day. (I’m probably not going to, though, because I need it too much. I can’t even explain, my insides are a mess.)

I had a great time. This is the only place where I felt like a part of the Doctor/Master fandom, as every other platform is practically dead regarding this ship. So, like I said, the acocunt’s gonna stay open and maybe semi-active (you know, reblogs and stuff), but that’s about it.

Much love, rock the stage, stay awesome!

I beg to differ.

You do what you need to do, that’s what’s most important.

But please let your decision be based on the fact that many, many people, not just me, derived great pleasure and satisfaction, great happiness, from reading your fanfictions, your metas, your critiques/analyses of Classic and New Who, your support of Thoschei and your courage in advocating unpopular points of view.   

You gave me hope, frequently, when I thought nobody would ever see why I was so saddened by what was done to the Master and Missy, in series ten.  You made me feel like I was not alone, when I was on the brink, secretly, of leaving the Whovian fandom. You did that. 

Just because we didn’t always respond immediately to your creative projects, doesn’t mean we didn’t love them. I know insecurity and depression lie to us, I know firsthand, and daily, and I know it’s hard, but please don’t let it blind you to the fact that other people also have problems, insecurities, that fill their days, and sometimes, their lack of reaction to what you pour your heart into, has nothing to do with the inherent value of your work, or even how much they love it.

If you still need to go, we will all be cheering you on to find peace of mind, and joy, even if we’re no longer a regular part of that equation.  Just please … have an accurate picture of how much you’re valued. ❤ 

HEYYO, this is the ultimate random ask of the day, but no one appreciates my Thoschei music suggestions, SOOoooOOO I’ve been wondering if you ever listened to “One Day Robots will cry” by Cobra Starship because it is THE Thoschei song and it gives me feels every damn time. Need to share feels. NEED.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTi1Uf0jBX4

The lyrics just gut me with their relevancy, yes, I’m in literal physical tears and I’m bolding the parts that made me start crying: 

This won’t hurt more than a pinch.
So just pour a drink.
Lets talk it over.
I’m back after all these years.

Don’t be afraid my dear.
Now I’m older.
Cause people change.
Can’t you see my eyes.
Are they not the same after the lies?

I know I’m like a machine.
But I still have dreams.
I know one day we will

Sleep for days.
Come over, come over.
I won’t make the same mistakes.
Come over, come over.
I’m dying not to hurt you.

In our dreams, we can be complete again.

When you were young, you kept a list.
Of the things you’d miss, as you got older.
I’ve known you, in every life I’ve lived.
Yeah, I’m still a kid.
Even though I’m colder.

When you were a child.
I was lost in the wild, but you built a home for me in the road.
I was born the cold.
Turn up the heat.

I know one day we will

Sleep for days.
Come over, come over.
I won’t make the same mistakes.
Come over, come over.
I’m dying not to hurt you.
In our dreams, we can be complete.
If we go to sleep, we can wake up home again.