idiopathicsmile:

“That well-dressed fellow in the corner? We call him the Gentleman Thief. Why, just last year, he single-handedly stole more than 40 gentlemen.”

Fortune Teller reading my palm: It just says “yikes.”

“Every moment with you is special.”

Koschei looks over the rim of his reading glasses at his husband, skeptically amused.

“Is this your latest ploy to get me to abandon my project and come to
bed?”

itsjustkind:

@masterfulxrhythm replied to your post: ⚠ ooh, can you do missy please?

yeah well we’re at the exact right height to kick you in the nuts

“…I’ll put your things on high shelves so you can’t reach them.”

“Spite won’t save your ballsack from my wrath.”

~~#married~~

treasurebucky:

Having a villain for a boyfriend would be like having a cat: he would live for snuggles, never come when you call him, have glow in the dark eyes, and leave dead bodies on your doorstep.

lol Thirteen is like #yep #except he always come when called #because hes a slut for attention

julielilac:

+bonus:

I love how the Doctor passive-aggressively loathes every single one of their other faces and then you have the Master all like:

and honestly–HONESTLY–which one is healthier that way? It ain’t the Doc.

Source: julielilac

“How the fuck?”

queencfevil:

sclfmastery:

“Honestly, that’s a … marvelous question.”

Their TARDIS is currently the size of a quarter, yet it’s also spitting out smoke and emitting a high noise like a mosquito buzz, in complaint.

“I think she’s got … . technological indigestion. But I’m not so sure
about the exterior dimension issue. Got a sheet of paper? Time for us
to brainstorm, I wager.”

Supercalifragilisticfuckingdisastrous.

Though it was so tiny, that it was kind of pretty. Just look at the tiny shapes the smoke created.

“Well then. Do you have any technological laxant?”

“Don’t talk about our Darling Girl so crassly! Although you’ve a good
point, but I fear it’ll be difficult to calculate the right amount of calibration
fluid when She’s, ehr, diminutive. We need to figure out what’s
dimensionally warped right here, in this particular space-time coordinate.”

“How the fuck?”

“Honestly, that’s a … marvelous question.”

Their TARDIS is currently the size of a quarter, yet it’s also spitting out smoke and emitting a high noise like a mosquito buzz, in complaint.

“I think she’s got … . technological indigestion. But I’m not so sure
about the exterior dimension issue. Got a sheet of paper? Time for us
to brainstorm, I wager.”

madwomaninabox13:

masterfulxrhythm:

madwomaninabox13:

“Nooooo, I can’t wearing boring BLACK to a Spice Girls concert!! I’ll look so out of place!” she whines, every bit as petulant as he was only a moment ago. Her brow furrows and her bottom lip sticks out like a naughty little girl caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

But a promise is a promise, and half a second later, she’s relenting with a huge, heaving sigh. “Fiiiiiiiiiiiiine, it’s only fair. Go on, do your worst. Make me plain and drab.”

“I never said BLACK, I said MONOCHROME, meaning you actually have
to achieve a matching color scheme.”

He thrusts his chest out, and places his hands on his hips.

“Are you accusing me, the most svelte of Time Lords, of being DRAB?”

“I’m accusing your wardrobe of being drab. How can you confine yourself to one colour when there’s a whole rainbow of them out there?” Really, that sums up quite a lot of the Doctor’s philosophy. It’s one of the reasons she has kept travelling for so long, the thrill of experiencing something new. Yes, she has her favourites, but she always feels driven to try everything and, given enough time, she’s bound to achieve it.

“And if it’s not going to be black, it’s going to be red, am I right?”