Ask my muse for romantic advice.

“Well I only know second-hand, really, beyond the single meaningful connection i’ve made all my long life.  It’s said that the key to comprehending a successful relationship, romantic or platonic, put in scientific terms, is symbiosis.  You simply … . balance the amount that you give and take, and you try to maintain focus on the needs of the other party.  And if they undergo a particularly difficult period in their life, you step oop to take on some additional burdens.  Somehow I always manage to muck it up anyway, I think, because I’m too jealous, too anxious to impress, and too … . fearful of being only a destructive force, so in order to not be a failure in the eyes of the person I hold in highest esteem, I throw myself full-force into being an arsehole.  And pretend that that’s all I was aiming to do, to begin with.”

A pause, and a crooked, tired smile.

“Or maybe I am just a dick.”